A Traveling Salesman
This traveling salesman
has worn out six vans
in 40 years and he
hopes to retire soon.
Age and illness
are growing concerns
and there isn’t a pill
for everything.
Every 20 miles or so
he has to stop for
a rest room, usually
at a gas station.
Then one day he sees
a highway billboard
that promises help.
He dials the 800 number
on his cell phone
and a machine answers:
“Incontinence Hotline.
Can you hold?”
Donal Mahoney
A Nuclear Childhood
What if your parents
had never met
had never married
had never yelled
at each other
and instead had wed
someone they loved
and lived peacefully
all those years.
That would have been
their Eden but you
shaking there now
decades later
wouldn’t be with us
cursing the tremors
of a nuclear childhood
you still remember
long after they’re dead.
Donal Mahoney
Answer Me This, America
Took the wife
to a pancake house
the other day.
National franchise
good food
fine reputation.
Skipped the pancakes
had bacon, eggs,
hash browns, toast
and coffee.
Wife went fancy,
had an omelette.
Grabbed the check
because the busboy
started clearing
the table early.
A young dervish
new to the job
swirling his cloth
for minimum wage.
Bothered me
to realize he'd work
three hours and a skosh
to pay for the same
breakfast, more
if he left a tip.
Reminded me
something’s wrong
with our great nation,
how we do business.
Have both ears open.
Hoping for an answer.
Donal Mahoney
Bison and Quail
I never think about bison.
After all, I live in St. Louis,
why should I?
But when I went hunting
for quail in Montana
I tripped and
broke my leg, flopped
on the tundra all night.
Come morning
I saw bison romping
toward me, hundreds of them
coming in thunder.
I heard them snorting.
Honestly, I’m not lying.
I thought about bison then.
I never think about ISIS, either.
I live in St. Louis, after all,
why should I?
Donal Mahoney
Hot Spots in the City
I turn on the news to see
who won the game last night
but first the scores from
hot spots in the city.
Two people are killed
and a house is set on fire.
An infant burns to death.
Two men hijack a car
and a mother is killed.
Her baby is tossed
from the car and
found a block away
alive in a car seat.
The mayor says
we need more cops.
Money’s the problem.
The police chief says
he’s sending more cops
to hot spots in the city.
The anchor says at noon
a demonstration at City Hall
for Black Lives Matter.
He doesn’t mention
any demonstrations at
hot spots in the city.
Donal Mahoney
A Stationary Bicycle
The doctor tells Phil and his wife
he’s in pretty good health for a man
his age but he needs to exercise.
And Phil says he agrees
and then goes on to explain
his faith in recliner therapy.
He sits in a recliner for hours,
watches TV or reads the paper
and wiggles his toes
at least three times a day.
The doctor asks if his wife if
they’d try a stationary bicycle.
She says she thinks there's
one somewhere in the basement.
Phil says his wife’s right as usual.
He saw it one night during a storm
when he went down to change a fuse.
Said he almost had a heart attack.
Donal Mahoney
