faced with a choice
i'm old enough now
to know the end is
much closer than i
want to believe
that one of these
days the breaths
will be harder to
produce
the alcohol won't
go down as smoothly
and i'll be faced
with a choice
take my own life
or let time take me
with it
considering the pain
i feel now and i'm
only in my early
forties
there won't be much
of a choice at all
suicide will be
my last attempt
at finding mercy
in this cruel world
--------------------------------------------------------------------
disposable souls
stuck in a world
full of disposable
souls
i can always
look back and
say if
fuck if
my life is at the
point where if
needs a little
more fucking
urgency
now, imagine
if the world
thought the
same thing
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
when the drugs stop working
i often wonder what
my mother will do
when the drugs stop
working
i see her now and then
looking over at my bar
i tell her to go ahead
and take the pills
with vodka
there's no way it's
going to get worse
besides, if you drink
enough
the pain takes care
of itself
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
threatened me with a good time and a better tomorrow
i remember all
my lovers like
it was yesterday
the ones in it
for the money
the ones who
would only fuck
in the dark
the ones who
liked to laugh
the ones who
wanted to run
away with me
the one who
probably would
have made the
best wife
the one who
became unbelievably
sexy when listening
to prince
of course, she's
into women now
the one who would
dance in my poems
and always bring me
a sense of warmth
and acceptance
the one that promised
an affair and then moved
a couple thousand miles
away
the one who promised to
murder me in my sleep
all of them have threatened
me with a good time and
a better tomorrow
all of them found something
better before ever giving me
the chance or second chance
or in one rare one, a third
chance
so be it
the next one is going to
be the luckiest woman
alive
-------------------------------------------------------------
silence and impending doom
lonely man on a lake
just his thoughts
silence and
impending doom
no family still around
same with friends
he visits more graves
in a week than bars
anymore
he constantly wonders
why he keeps hanging
on
he feels a tug on the
fishing line
another little one
he'll sit for hours
catching next to
nothing
no ambition to find
a better lake
with better fish
and something other
than a gravel road
------------------------------------------------------------------------
my plan of apathy
i voted for
the first time
since god
knows when
this year
it has become
quite obvious
that my plan
of apathy just
wasn't fucking
working
so now, i guess
it's time to fuck
it all up from
within
------------------------------------------------------------------------
J.J. Campbell
jcampb4593@aol.com
http://evildelights.blogspot.com
http://sites.google.com/site/losersincsite/
http://soundcloud.com/j-j-campbell
http://goodreads.com/jjthepoet
