Thursday, April 23, 2015

Near Genius, like Almost Coughing

I am composed of mostly water.

The glacial shelf is melting.
The experts expect water levels
to rise.

Deductive reasoning:

I will get taller
and fill out
and need a whole new
wardrobe
before too
long.

Now you see
why I scored 136
on my IQ Test.

There is no fooling
me.

From Here to Maternity

The blow up doll
that came through the mail
was impossible to
inflate.

She had holes
where there were not supposed
to be holes.
So I shaved my beard
and glued the hair to her back.

Then I balled up all the socks
in my sock drawer
and threw them against the wall
like I was pitching the world
series.

Love it or Leave it

I eat again
at my favourite restaurant.

A secret little hole in the wall
that only the locals seem
to know.

With cheap plastic red-checkered
table coverings
and the best food.

And I like it because it is quiet.
There are no rednecks there.
The ones that tailgate you in jacked up trucks
and always say:
love it or leave it
as if they were words from the lost gospel
of St. Cletus.

Love it or leave it.
A redneck ultimatum.

As I pay my bill at the cash
and head for the exit
I wonder why I can’t
do both.

Maybe this is Why Van Gogh Did It?

The kid on the pavement struggled
to move his head
while two older boys held it
firmly in place,
turned to one side
so a third boy
leaning over the screaming child
could hock a loogie,
a long throaty thick one from the depths,
letting it fall closer and closer to the ear
then sucking it back up at the last moment
before it dropped finally into the ear canal
and the older boys ran off
laughing.

Capone

syphilitic
and
half
demented

in
the
end

in
his
Florida
estate

on
palm
island,

old
associates
flying
in

pretending
to
take
orders

like
big
Al

was
still
in
charge,

set
up
in
a
deck
chair

by
the
pool

with
his
fishing
rod

and
cap

by
his
wife,

spending
his
days

trying
to
hook
the
big
one

in
a
swimming
pool

of
no

fish.

Kennedy through the Streets of Dallas
with the Top Down

launch a lawsuit
launch a fanzine
launch a rocket to
the moon

spill your milk
spill oil in the North Sea
spill the beans

on Kennedy
through the streets
of Dallas

with the top
down.

Ryan Quinn Flanagan